How often have you questioned your beliefs, values, standards, morals, and ethics? It’s interesting because we walk around with all these beliefs, values, standards, morals, and ethics, yet how often do we question ourselves?  Do you know how you came to believe in what you believe in? The StaySmilinLife way is not one to “should” on anyone, rather we simply ask that you live a life where you clearly understand why you have whatever beliefs you have, and check whether or not they allow you to be truly happy. Like it or not, our mental diet has a lot to do with how we are. 

Right now you are probably thinking, “What is a mental diet?” We believe a mental diet to be all that we put into our minds. What we read, the music we listen to, the conversations we pay attention to, the shows and movies we watch, the news we consume, the YouTube videos we go down rabbit holes on, the people we follow on Instagram, the advice we believe, the criticism we own, the abuse we tolerate… 

What we put in, or gets put in our minds, is often what we get out, and for many of us, we do not realize just how influential all of it is. It is through choosing personal responsibility that one will find happiness, and we at StaySmilinLife are promoting the idea we each need to take responsibility for what we feed our minds, and expose our minds to, and body (find more on physical health in our Health article).

Our minds are powerful, more powerful than most people realize. The brain is constantly working, analyzing our environment, taking in new information, processing our worries and fears, and a whole slew of other things, all without us asking it to do any of it. And when we DO ask it to do something… well, sometimes we find our minds can be a little hard to control (Switch is a great book about controlling what goes on up there). Our mind can be both our best friend and worst enemy, and thankfully, for the most part, it is up to each of us to decide which of the two it will be. Simply put, think of your brain as a muscle that you can shape and tone so that you have a higher chance of it being your best friend throughout the day (not to say it’s all smooth sailing as sometimes we even have to set Boundaries to help us out). That being said, your mind has already been shaped and toned by your life experiences, the people who have been in your life, and the outside information you, and your environment, have fed it up until today. 

The sum total, whatever you believe, even subconsciously, is basically some jambalaya of all that you have exposed your mind to. 

If you don’t like your thoughts then we’re here to let you know YOU have the power to change your mind, literally, and train it to think differently. How? Change your mental diet.

So far you may be thinking, “Hmm, ok, I can roll with that logic. If I eat nothing but ice cream and cake, and I ended up being obese or diabetic and have a mouth full of cavities, I wouldn’t be so surprised…” However, we want to take it a step further.

Your mental diet also affects your emotions and behavior… Think about it… Your mental diet is like an investment. If you invest in fear, i.e. watch scary movies, consume news of shootings, crime, crashes, disease, and death, you will likely walk around anxious about what can go wrong and behave in accordance with your anxious thoughts. If you spend your time learning, thinking of things that make you smile, creating happy memories, having honest conversations, and investing in the belief that you’ll figure it out and things will work out somehow, those are investments that will benefit you with positive returns, and smiles. 

What’s the ROI (return on investment) of fear-based thinking? And then acting upon such thinking? What is investing in the belief that “life’s going to suck” going to give you in return? How could it possibly be anything other than a bad return on investment? Here is a cool quick video clip of Tony Robbins breaking this idea down.

What’s the ROI of being optimistic, hopeful, and believing in goodness? And then acting upon such hope and thoughts? What do you think is possible when you combine optimism, hope, determination and drive? Just about anything, if you ask us.

The bottom line is: you gotta pay attention to what you are investing your time and energy on.

StaySmilinLife will provide blogs, book reviews, and video clips that have helped us on our journeys, with the hope they can help you learn to think more positively, help you make lemonade when life gives you lemons, say yes before you say no to something new (of course… not necessarily EVERYTHING new…), and encourage you to actively live your life instead of watching life happen to you. 

There are many influences bombarding us and suggesting life is black and white. “Buy this and you’ll be sexier (implying happier),” and “Drink this and you’ll have more energy (implying you’ll be happier).” Is life black and white? We don’t think so, and even if it turns out to be, who decides what is black and what is white? Is stealing always a sin, even if to feed a child? If a lie could end all wars, would you tell it? We aren’t here to answer those questions for you. Whatever your beliefs, values, standards, morals, and ethics, we hope that you at least know why you think the way that you do, and you understand how your Mental Diet can allow you to live a life where you are mentally free to be happy.

Kristina’s Truth… I used to spend a LOT of time on Facebook and Google, but mostly Facebook, going down rabbit holes of news stories, a lot of which were political news stories. After constantly getting irritated at the fact I kept losing hours of my life I can’t ever get back, I installed a Chrome extension called FB Purity to block the trending news feeds on Facebook. I also changed my Google setting to where it no longer suggests articles to me. I did this for two reasons: first, to save time and stop looking for rabbits, the second reason, to stop seeing political articles that express my own view. I stumbled across a theory that suggested the reason why our country (in the United States) seems so divided now is that everyone gets fed more and more fodder for their own viewpoint. I was curious about the idea that if you continue to consume more and more like-minded information, you’ll be less and less likely to be open-minded. I believe that it is through compromise, understanding, and empathizing with differing viewpoints that our society will improve. So, now I consciously feed my mind information that is contrary to my beliefs.

Tayari’s “Two Cents…”  Talking about a mental diet…ohhh how thankful I am I went on a mental diet! My thoughts were “fat and marinated” in the group-think of an environment surrounded by the gangs in South East San Diego. The negative energy I needed to uphold and maintain an ego and image so I wouldn’t be tested, especially on days when my Crohn’s disease flares were peaking, was a lot to handle. Every day felt like a tug-o-war, especially the peer pressure to conform. I didn’t know it at the time, but picking up my bike and finding BMX dirt jumps to build and practice on helped me tremendously. It allowed me to be at peace, to relax, and align with who I truly was and gave me an out (instead of being up in the streets) as I had “something to go do as soon as I got home.” I defended that space because it was stress-free fun that helped keep my Crohn’s in check.  It also gave me space to tap into who I believed I really was; I chose to identify as being “down” with BMX and dirt riding, as opposed to being “down” with one of the local gangs. Connecting the dots looking back on it all, that was probably the first significant mental diet I went on; it got my mental “weight” down.  In terms of food for thought, a mental diet can be extremely helpful for a number of reasons. In my situation, I removed myself from a situation I knew deep down that would influence negative ways of thinking and being. Wasn’t so cognizant of it then, but being able to introspect and connect the dots now, it gives me a reminder to keep doing what I know works, defending my happiness and what my gut tells me is right (hard to tell the difference between the voices of my gut, fear, the streets and whoppin’s sometimes though). Nowadays, I try to be mindful of what goes into my head and out my mouth. The common saying is that you are what you eat.  I believe not only that, but that you are what you think as well. In today’s society, there are so many commands and directives that are geared toward hijacking your thinking for control; control over your ability to think, and truly live freely. Implementing a mental diet, I feel, can have a positive effect on your happiness because it’s an ongoing active process to make sure you remain on track to who you want to become, and why (which I think is the most important). In the words of Mark Twain, “The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why.” Isn’t it time for you to take 2 days off? Heck, you might be able to turn a weekend into a strong-end =)

It’s Me, Yoichi! I understand our mental diet relies a lot on our nationality and how we were brought up. Nature vs Nurture. But I believe that there is a third influence, and that’s what you absorb from the choices you make. It seems people are often molded from childhood as to how they should think and what they should expect in life. I like to spend a lot of time observing people and take in the different cultures and how people act. I learn so much more being in different environments than from watching things on Youtube, Instagram and Facebook.  Don’t get me wrong, there are a lot of good things, positive things and useful things on the internet. I just prefer first-hand experience. I get the benefit of being able to ask questions about things I don’t know, or talk to/communicate with the people I’m around.  What’s cool is that by being in new environments I started to see good and bad things people say and do to support each other. I strive to always look for the positive view of any situation, and hope for the best. This helps me try to do good, and try to be good.

But lately I’ve noticed people watching more and more non-educational YouTube videos, Instagrams and Facebook feeds. There seems to be a trend of talking about feeling unhappy that other people are having so much more fun than they are. It seems many think other people are better off then they are. I’m not going to lie, I’ve caught myself doing exactly the same things and feeling the same way. Sometimes I’m guilty of this and start to compare my life to others’ perfect highlight videos, yet I know they don’t really show the struggle. Whenever I find myself in this funk I talk with my StaySmilinLife partners, ask how they avoid this trap, and they helped me change my view by encouraging me to look for fun and educational videos that promote positivity and actually usable information to help my mental diet. I’ll pay it forward so you can see for yourself; I’ll make sure to post the good mental diet stuff on our page!

Carlos’ Thinky Thinky… Watching what I feed my brain seems to have saved my life. I’m not even kidding. I’ve always been a positive dude, full, and I mean full of energy. That generally is a great combination. However, like seemingly everything in life (Yin and Yang, duality, balance, etc.), there’s another side to the great combination. I’ve been in mental places where it felt like I was getting my a.. whooped in an epic martial arts fight, for what felt like forever. I started hating myself, lost who I was, and didn’t trust anything or anyone. Not once, but twice, maybe three times in my life. The thing is, each time it was worse and worse. Somehow I ended up watching some YouTube videos of people with awesome voices (a few had voices that were utterly terrible, but I learned to listen for content), saying inspirational and motivational things and quotes, with epic soundtracks in the background. Low and behold, I started feeling a little better and seeing things a little differently. Then, once I got what I got out of that genre of YouTube videos, and they began seeming repetitive (probably watched hundreds of the videos), my nephew-brother, an incredible guy, sent me an Audible book thingy. Psssssshhhhh, what?!? All it took was one dope book (thankfully my first Audible book was dope, The Greatest Minds and Ideas of All Time by Will Durrant), and I was hooked. I also found out I’m an auditory learner. I’ve listened to at least 14 audiobooks a year, and countless awesome (and sometimes lame) YouTube videos, since starting this mental diet thing in 2016 (I didn’t know it was a mental diet then). I can’t stress it enough: listening to inspiring, empowering, positive, and most importantly, educational material, EVERY DAY, has helped turn a whack frown straight upside down.

Not only has it beat back my depression, even on rare gloomy days, changing my mental diet has significantly improved my ability to foster Human Connection. I find myself enjoying just about every conversation I have now because I’m always in a mental state to learn, to be challenged, and to challenge myself. My curiosity muscle is way more buff than my fear muscle, so I tend to ask a lot of questions from a place of genuineness and seeking to understand others. Sometimes I come off as a bit direct, but because I’m authentic in my interest in others, I find that people generally tell me all sorts of stuff that they later tell me they don’t usually talk about. Anytime I find that my mood is low, and I can’t think of something that actually caused it, I usually realize I fell off my daily healthy mental diet. 

We Believe In You

With so many options of things to watch, read, and listen to… but with most of the money pushing messages of fear, envy, and shallowness… it’s no wonder so many of us have been marinated in stinkin’ thinkin’ (thanks Zig Ziglar for the term). Join us at StaySmilinLife, switch up your mental diet, and take back your happiness.